You know, there are so many things I didn't know before I had kids. (And there are still so many more I have yet to discover I'm sure.) For instance, I had no idea that for a child, selecting a Crispix from the cereal bowl was more stringent a process than selecting the next Miss USA. It's true. Here's something else I didn't know: children can start training for the Olympics in their own homes before they're even 12 months old. I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it, but the J Man practices his discus throw on a regular basis. He may throw things backwards, but he's got great form. I also didn't know that a child less than five months old could do what I like to call "motor boating" where the child uses wet lips to make the sound of a motor boat engine--even with a bottle in her mouth. Nor did I know that a child could effectively get pinned in a child safety gate. Yep, the J Man (who is a big MacGyver fan and Angus wanna be) got his arm stuck between the wall and the child safety gate trying to open the basement door from this side of the gate. But I've got to hand it to him (no pun intended), after a few moments of wailing and tears, he went right back over to the gate and quite successfully started trying to open the basement door with his other arm. We would put a safety door knob cover on the door, but he learned how to pull those off months ago. (Did I say MacGyver wanna be?)
Speaking of MacGyver, I guess you really have to be careful of what you watch while your children are young and even while they are in the womb. Yes, when the J Man was only a few months old, I discovered the joy of hulu.com and fancast.com. We watched all of the MacGyver episodes they had. It was nice since I had missed them all the first time around. (During the years that I was in school, I really didn't watch any television.) Anyway, now, the kid thinks he's MacGyver. I guess it's not a bad thing that my child aspires to be like Mac, so I guess I lucked out on that one. It's just going to be a little tough during the toddler years. Oh, and I put Pretty Girl's outgrown bassinet in the way of the basement door so he can't open it. So far, it's working.
Here's another case in point. This last Christmas (while I was very pregnant with Pretty Girl), I received season 1-4 of Stargate Atlantis. I watched them faithfully whenever I needed a break, had to eat, or found a little time after the J Man went to bed. So, what happened? Pretty Girl was born on David Nykl's birthday. It was her choice, I had nothing to do with it. In fact, the doctors tried to induce her twice, but she wouldn't budge. I rather think it's kind of nice though; after all, he is my favorite, and I guess she must like him too. (But come on, who doesn't?) So, I guess I lucked out again.
Monday, July 6, 2009
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
I Dream of Paul McGillion?
Let me preface this post by saying that I quite often have very vivid, yet very weird dreams. In fact, anything, yes, anything can happen. That being said...
The other night, I dreamt that I was at my childhood church. I was about 20 and had two kids but was unmarried (in the dream, not in real life), and I don't recall any details as to who the father was or exactly how it came about that I had two kids. I just did. (You know how dreams are.) Anyway, while I was there, I saw my friend Paul McGillion who was also 20. (In my dream he was not a celebrity, just a friend and nothing more.) He put his arm around me in just a casual, friendly fashion and I felt a kick. Apparently, he was, well, um, potent (that's the word I'm going with) enough to cause my body to instantaneously conceive all by itself. (Where's the fun in that?) Later, when I tried to tell him what had happened, it happened again. So now, I was carrying two. Of course by this time, I was afraid to talk to him in any way except by telephone.
The next morning (now back to real life), I told Double O Daddy that I hadn't slept very well because I was dreaming, and I told him about it. I assured him that there was no funny business going on in the dream, but he didn't seem too worried about that. His response was a very casual, "Stop eating chili after 9 o'clock." Thank you Jeff Foxworthy.
Golly. Ah well, I suppose it's all Paul's fault anyway. I mean look at that photo. But I guess I better not look too long, huh?
P.S. If Paul M. ever reads this, I hope he's flattered and as good a sport as David N. was a few weeks ago. Thanks in advance.
The other night, I dreamt that I was at my childhood church. I was about 20 and had two kids but was unmarried (in the dream, not in real life), and I don't recall any details as to who the father was or exactly how it came about that I had two kids. I just did. (You know how dreams are.) Anyway, while I was there, I saw my friend Paul McGillion who was also 20. (In my dream he was not a celebrity, just a friend and nothing more.) He put his arm around me in just a casual, friendly fashion and I felt a kick. Apparently, he was, well, um, potent (that's the word I'm going with) enough to cause my body to instantaneously conceive all by itself. (Where's the fun in that?) Later, when I tried to tell him what had happened, it happened again. So now, I was carrying two. Of course by this time, I was afraid to talk to him in any way except by telephone.
The next morning (now back to real life), I told Double O Daddy that I hadn't slept very well because I was dreaming, and I told him about it. I assured him that there was no funny business going on in the dream, but he didn't seem too worried about that. His response was a very casual, "Stop eating chili after 9 o'clock." Thank you Jeff Foxworthy.
Golly. Ah well, I suppose it's all Paul's fault anyway. I mean look at that photo. But I guess I better not look too long, huh?
P.S. If Paul M. ever reads this, I hope he's flattered and as good a sport as David N. was a few weeks ago. Thanks in advance.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
It's Your Turn
As I was daydreaming today (a necessary part of keeping my sanity), I was wondering, "If I could be a superhero, what kind would I be? What kind of powers would I have, and what would I call myself?" Then I thought, "What if I could touch someone and make them fall asleep?" (You can tell I dream big, can't you? And wouldn't that be a lonely life???) I guess then my nickname would be "The ________." [Insert whatever you want. I deleted what I originally had because I wouldn't want to offend anyone here.] Hmmm, maybe I could become invisible and pass through walls. I suppose then I could call myself something like "The Specter." Wouldn't that make for a great spy? But then I'm sure I would see a lot of things I didn't want to see, especially if I'm not paying attention to where I'm going. Well, what if I could make people see things that weren't really there? I could call myself "Mirage." That sounds cool, but I don't know. I've heard it said that one should always go with one's talents. OK, then I suppose it's obvious what my superpowers would be (at least according to Double O Daddy anyway). I'd have the uncanny ability to nag any husband to death in a single sentence while I'm slamming him with the next. Yeah, I could do that in my sleep. But what would my nickname be??? Any suggestions?
Now it's your turn. I would love to know what kind of superhero (or villain) you would be if you had the choice. What would your powers be? And be sure to tell me what cool nickname you would have. I would love to hear what you have to say. (Just please, keep it clean. Thanks.)
Friday, June 12, 2009
Today is Someday...
Hello again. It has been one of those days. Nothing is really wrong except that the J Man has been sent to the penalty box for the second time today. Sigh. Anyway, have you ever been doing what you always do and then something happens or someone says something that triggers a memory that you'd rather not remember? Well, that has happened to me twice today. I wish that I could just permanently forget these things. I want to tell someone, but talking doesn't help. No one wants to hear about it anyway. Nothing makes it go away, and no one has ever been able to help me. So, I guess I'll just watch some Zelenka videos on YouTube. He always makes me smile. Wait, that's it. In my first post, I said that Radek Zelenka was my favorite character and that maybe someday I would tell you why. Well, today is someday...
What I like about Radek Zelenka...
1) He's brilliant.
2) He's modest, humble, and mild mannered.
3) He's an underdog and unsung hero.
4) He and Dr. Carson Beckett are the sweetest two guys in Atlantis.
5) He's got a great accent. (He can "Talk Zelenka" to me any time.)
(Hey, I'm smiling! I knew it would work!)
6) He and Dr. Beckett are both very gentle. (Have you ever seen Zelenka touch a keyboard? No pounding. In fact, I can't imagine him ever hitting or handling anything roughly.)
7) He puts up with Rodney.
(OK, now I'm chuckling.)
8) He's a medvidek. (Sorry, I did the best I could with English characters.)
9) I like his hair. (I won't tell you why, but I do.)
10) I'm partial to blue eyes. (Dr. Beckett has them too.)
(Oh, and can you tell who my second favorite character is?)
11) He's considerate. (Watch the opening of Identity.)
12) He has a nice smile.
13 & 14) I won't tell you.
15) He's generally quiet (except when he's cursing in Czech).
16) He speaks Czech. (Any foreign language is a plus, and a Slavic one is even better.)
17) He's cute (especially when he's being bashful).
18, 19, and 20) I won't tell you.
(Now I'm laughing.)
21) He's funny.
22) I love his facial expressions, eye movements, and hand gestures.
23) He's not arrogant and never asks for any recognition or applause.
24) He looks good clean-shaven or with stubble. (Most men are one way or the other.)
25) He's a good worker.
26) He never says anything bad about anyone (except Rodney, but let's face it, he deserves it).
27) He seldom complains (except to himself in Czech and usually about Rodney).
28) I plead the 5th.
29) He would only lose a certain game to one other person. (Sorry, I can't tell you.)
30 & 31) Something else I won't tell you.
32) He's selfless (as when he tried to go to the satellite Wraith zapper thingy in The Siege. Don't you love it when I use technical language?)
33) I think he would be a wonderful friend.
34) He's an all around nice guy and a good person.
OK, just to be fair, here are the things I don't like about Radek Zelenka...
1) He's not real.
2) He doesn't like kids. (He hasn't exactly had much experience with good ones though, so I can't really fault him for that.)
3) It seems like he's always getting zapped (Tao of Rodney, Quarantine...) or injured (Adrift, Identity...) (Each time I say, "Don't kill/hurt Zelenka!!!")
4) He never gets a girlfriend or even a kiss on the cheek for pity sake. (What's that about? If Rodney can get Allina (The Brotherhood), Katie, and Dr. Keller to like him, then why can't Radek have a love interest?)
5) Hmmmm... Nope, I suppose that's it.
OK, so I'm feeling a lot better now. Thanks a lot to the writers of Stargate Atlantis for creating and of course to David Nykl for playing such a wonderful, lovable character.
P.S. Just in case you were wondering, no, I'm not in love with Zelenka. I like him a lot, but that's it. And all the "I won't tell you" lines were just for fun. I needed a good mischievous laugh. Thanks in advance to David Nykl for being such a good sport.
What I like about Radek Zelenka...
1) He's brilliant.
2) He's modest, humble, and mild mannered.
3) He's an underdog and unsung hero.
4) He and Dr. Carson Beckett are the sweetest two guys in Atlantis.
5) He's got a great accent. (He can "Talk Zelenka" to me any time.)
(Hey, I'm smiling! I knew it would work!)
6) He and Dr. Beckett are both very gentle. (Have you ever seen Zelenka touch a keyboard? No pounding. In fact, I can't imagine him ever hitting or handling anything roughly.)
7) He puts up with Rodney.
(OK, now I'm chuckling.)
8) He's a medvidek. (Sorry, I did the best I could with English characters.)
9) I like his hair. (I won't tell you why, but I do.)
10) I'm partial to blue eyes. (Dr. Beckett has them too.)
(Oh, and can you tell who my second favorite character is?)
11) He's considerate. (Watch the opening of Identity.)
12) He has a nice smile.
13 & 14) I won't tell you.
15) He's generally quiet (except when he's cursing in Czech).
16) He speaks Czech. (Any foreign language is a plus, and a Slavic one is even better.)
17) He's cute (especially when he's being bashful).
18, 19, and 20) I won't tell you.
(Now I'm laughing.)
21) He's funny.
22) I love his facial expressions, eye movements, and hand gestures.
23) He's not arrogant and never asks for any recognition or applause.
24) He looks good clean-shaven or with stubble. (Most men are one way or the other.)
25) He's a good worker.
26) He never says anything bad about anyone (except Rodney, but let's face it, he deserves it).
27) He seldom complains (except to himself in Czech and usually about Rodney).
28) I plead the 5th.
29) He would only lose a certain game to one other person. (Sorry, I can't tell you.)
30 & 31) Something else I won't tell you.
32) He's selfless (as when he tried to go to the satellite Wraith zapper thingy in The Siege. Don't you love it when I use technical language?)
33) I think he would be a wonderful friend.
34) He's an all around nice guy and a good person.
OK, just to be fair, here are the things I don't like about Radek Zelenka...
1) He's not real.
2) He doesn't like kids. (He hasn't exactly had much experience with good ones though, so I can't really fault him for that.)
3) It seems like he's always getting zapped (Tao of Rodney, Quarantine...) or injured (Adrift, Identity...) (Each time I say, "Don't kill/hurt Zelenka!!!")
4) He never gets a girlfriend or even a kiss on the cheek for pity sake. (What's that about? If Rodney can get Allina (The Brotherhood), Katie, and Dr. Keller to like him, then why can't Radek have a love interest?)
5) Hmmmm... Nope, I suppose that's it.
OK, so I'm feeling a lot better now. Thanks a lot to the writers of Stargate Atlantis for creating and of course to David Nykl for playing such a wonderful, lovable character.
P.S. Just in case you were wondering, no, I'm not in love with Zelenka. I like him a lot, but that's it. And all the "I won't tell you" lines were just for fun. I needed a good mischievous laugh. Thanks in advance to David Nykl for being such a good sport.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Everyone's a Critic
As you know, I am a homemaker and as such I am responsible for most of the housework. (Double O Daddy really helps me out with tough stuff.) Anyway, the other day I wanted to get some vacuuming done in the family room. Normally, I wait until the J Man has gone to bed and Pretty Girl is either awake downstairs or asleep in her crib. However, the planets had not aligned on that for a while, so I thought I would take a chance and vacuum while the J Man was awake and in the same room. That was daring. I must admit though that he took it very well. He stayed up on the couch and watched me as I moved his toys and vacuumed here and there. When I was finished, I put the vacuum away in the other room where it is just visible beyond one of the child gates we have set up for his protection (and my sanity).
Today, as the J Man was playing in the family room, he took my hand and led me to the gate between that room and the vacuum cleaner. Curious to see what he wanted, I led him through. He led me straight back to the vacuum cleaner. When I held him up, he wouldn't touch it nor would he let me put his hand on it. So, I took him back to the family room. Moments later, he was back at the gate beating his fists together and pointing at the vacuum cleaner. (Beating his fists together is his own sign for "I want.") Now, we are trying to get the cute little bugger to talk, so I didn't take him to it. But he persisted. Finally, I got the vacuum cleaner and plugged it in. The J Man went straight for the safety of the couch. As I started to vacuum, I turned to Double O Daddy and said, "Now I'm getting nagged by my kids to do housework, and he doesn't even speak yet!" (Of course I said it with a big smile on my face, and of course, Double O Daddy started to chuckle.) I guess everyone's a critic.
Today, as the J Man was playing in the family room, he took my hand and led me to the gate between that room and the vacuum cleaner. Curious to see what he wanted, I led him through. He led me straight back to the vacuum cleaner. When I held him up, he wouldn't touch it nor would he let me put his hand on it. So, I took him back to the family room. Moments later, he was back at the gate beating his fists together and pointing at the vacuum cleaner. (Beating his fists together is his own sign for "I want.") Now, we are trying to get the cute little bugger to talk, so I didn't take him to it. But he persisted. Finally, I got the vacuum cleaner and plugged it in. The J Man went straight for the safety of the couch. As I started to vacuum, I turned to Double O Daddy and said, "Now I'm getting nagged by my kids to do housework, and he doesn't even speak yet!" (Of course I said it with a big smile on my face, and of course, Double O Daddy started to chuckle.) I guess everyone's a critic.
Monday, May 18, 2009
The Adventures of J Man
My kids are great. (I know every parent thinks that about their kids, or they should anyway.) J Man loves videos. He especially likes Novi Ierusalim (see novij.com). He gets that from me. He also likes anything with buttons or switches. Unfortunately, I can't always keep him from pushing or flipping them because I do have to feed Pretty Girl sometime. Yeah, he likes to get up on the love seat, lean over as far as he can, and flip the switch to the fireplace. Well, Double-O-Daddy took care of that this week. He swapped out the face plate with a blank. Now the boy just looks at it and fondly thinks of days gone by.
The J lair is another issue. It was a bit of bad planning on my part to put the changing table under the light switch. Yep, rookie mistake. Of course I thought the worst of it was just keeping the boy in the right position while trying to change him. Nope. One night when the J Man had captured a pretty nasty super villain (that's my story, and I'm sticking to it), he decided to flip the switch while I was in the middle of doing the paperwork for incarceration. Yep, I had two legs in one hand, a full confession statement in the other, and no light. Oy!
He was really cute the other day though. For some reason, he likes to be startled and he likes to be chased. Well, I had him up in the ball room (a room that is empty except for balls and a few other toys so it's is safe for the J Man to throw, kick, and play), and I decided to tire him out a little. As I began to chase him with my characteristic "Gonna Getcha Hand" (outstretched arm and wiggling fingers), he squealed with glee, threw his arms above his head, and ran for the safety of the closet. Unfortunately though, he wasn't looking where he was going and smacked right into the back of the closet. His arms were still above his head and it looked just like a cartoon. He seemed OK (he was still giggling), so I laughed. I just couldn't help it.
These kids bring me so much joy. I wish I could post pictures, but Double-O-Daddy said no. (I suppose it's a national security issue.) But take it from me, they are cute!
The J lair is another issue. It was a bit of bad planning on my part to put the changing table under the light switch. Yep, rookie mistake. Of course I thought the worst of it was just keeping the boy in the right position while trying to change him. Nope. One night when the J Man had captured a pretty nasty super villain (that's my story, and I'm sticking to it), he decided to flip the switch while I was in the middle of doing the paperwork for incarceration. Yep, I had two legs in one hand, a full confession statement in the other, and no light. Oy!
He was really cute the other day though. For some reason, he likes to be startled and he likes to be chased. Well, I had him up in the ball room (a room that is empty except for balls and a few other toys so it's is safe for the J Man to throw, kick, and play), and I decided to tire him out a little. As I began to chase him with my characteristic "Gonna Getcha Hand" (outstretched arm and wiggling fingers), he squealed with glee, threw his arms above his head, and ran for the safety of the closet. Unfortunately though, he wasn't looking where he was going and smacked right into the back of the closet. His arms were still above his head and it looked just like a cartoon. He seemed OK (he was still giggling), so I laughed. I just couldn't help it.
These kids bring me so much joy. I wish I could post pictures, but Double-O-Daddy said no. (I suppose it's a national security issue.) But take it from me, they are cute!
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Things I Never Thought I'd...
Hello again. You know, life never ceases to amaze me. I'm not talking about the awe-inspiring type of amazement like the Grand Canyon, a rainbow, or Mt. Rushmore. I'm talking about the "I can't believe this is actually happening" and "I'm going to laugh about this later" variety. And it seems that some of the things that amaze me most have happened after I've had children. For instance, there have been things that I never ever would have imagined myself saying or doing until after I had children and actually did them. I'm sure those of you who have these sweet little ankle-biting blessings completely understand. Here are just a few things I never thought I'd _______ (fill in the blank with a nice verb), that is until I had kids...
1) I never thought I'd have to tell someone, "Stop dancing on my chest." And believe it or not I was standing up at the time.
2) I never thought I'd hear myself say, "Get your foot out of the baby food jar!" That was before I started using a high chair. Can you imagine a baby trying to stick his foot into a jar of green beans while I'm trying to feed him? Ah, the J Man, he is a cutie.
3) Speaking of green beans, I never thought I'd have to clean baby food off of the wall above the sliding patio door. Yep. Cleaning it off of the floor and vertical blinds below was the easy part.
4) I never thought I'd find food on several sides of my computer. Come to think of it, the food was green beans. Hmm, I'm beginning to sense a theme here. I'm just glad he likes the orange vegetables.
And I know that these little tidbits will not be the last or even the greatest amazements, but with two kids under two, I'm still new to this parenting thing. I'm just trying to enjoy this time of peace before my son learns to flush the toilet... Ugh!
1) I never thought I'd have to tell someone, "Stop dancing on my chest." And believe it or not I was standing up at the time.
2) I never thought I'd hear myself say, "Get your foot out of the baby food jar!" That was before I started using a high chair. Can you imagine a baby trying to stick his foot into a jar of green beans while I'm trying to feed him? Ah, the J Man, he is a cutie.
3) Speaking of green beans, I never thought I'd have to clean baby food off of the wall above the sliding patio door. Yep. Cleaning it off of the floor and vertical blinds below was the easy part.
4) I never thought I'd find food on several sides of my computer. Come to think of it, the food was green beans. Hmm, I'm beginning to sense a theme here. I'm just glad he likes the orange vegetables.
And I know that these little tidbits will not be the last or even the greatest amazements, but with two kids under two, I'm still new to this parenting thing. I'm just trying to enjoy this time of peace before my son learns to flush the toilet... Ugh!
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