Things I Didn't Know Before I Had Kids

You know, there are so many things I didn't know before I had kids. (And there are still so many more I have yet to discover I'm sure.) For instance, I had no idea that for a child, selecting a Crispix from the cereal bowl was more stringent a process than selecting the next Miss USA. It's true. Here's something else I didn't know: children can start training for the Olympics in their own homes before they're even 12 months old. I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it, but the J Man practices his discus throw on a regular basis. He may throw things backwards, but he's got great form. I also didn't know that a child less than five months old could do what I like to call "motor boating" where the child uses wet lips to make the sound of a motor boat engine--even with a bottle in her mouth. Nor did I know that a child could effectively get pinned in a child safety gate. Yep, the J Man (who is a big MacGyver fan and Angus wanna be) got his arm stuck between the wall and the child safety gate trying to open the basement door from this side of the gate. But I've got to hand it to him (no pun intended), after a few moments of wailing and tears, he went right back over to the gate and quite successfully started trying to open the basement door with his other arm. We would put a safety door knob cover on the door, but he learned how to pull those off months ago. (Did I say MacGyver wanna be?)

Speaking of MacGyver, I guess you really have to be careful of what you watch while your children are young and even while they are in the womb. Yes, when the J Man was only a few months old, I discovered the joy of hulu.com and fancast.com. We watched all of the MacGyver episodes they had. It was nice since I had missed them all the first time around. (During the years that I was in school, I really didn't watch any television.) Anyway, now, the kid thinks he's MacGyver. I guess it's not a bad thing that my child aspires to be like Mac, so I guess I lucked out on that one. It's just going to be a little tough during the toddler years. Oh, and I put Pretty Girl's outgrown bassinet in the way of the basement door so he can't open it. So far, it's working.

Here's another case in point. This last Christmas (while I was very pregnant with Pretty Girl), I received season 1-4 of Stargate Atlantis. I watched them faithfully whenever I needed a break, had to eat, or found a little time after the J Man went to bed. So, what happened? Pretty Girl was born on David Nykl's birthday. It was her choice, I had nothing to do with it. In fact, the doctors tried to induce her twice, but she wouldn't budge. I rather think it's kind of nice though; after all, he is my favorite, and I guess she must like him too. (But come on, who doesn't?) So, I guess I lucked out again.